It is all right

A joke Lucas told me - what would you say if you have your left leg and your left arm cut off? .
The answer is ÏT IS ALL RIGHT.


He is getting sharp at picking up jokes.

Reverse Psychology

One day, in the car during a journey to somewhere, Lucas started this conversation


Lucas: Mom, I have a method to get all the things I ask for from you.
Me: Hmmm...
Lucas: I won't tell you the method.
ME: OK.
Lucas: Do you want to know ? (he is getting impatient).
Dom: Lucas, if you tell Mom, then Mom will know.
Lucas: (can't hold any longer) It is reverse psychology.
Me: Ah...where did you find this?
Lucas: Dairy of Wimpy Kid
Me: What did it say?
Lucas: It says if I tell you I do not want something, I will get it.
Me: You can try and see if you will get it.
Dom: Lucas, you can play iPad the whole day. (laughed).
Me: Yeah, right. You will not get it either way I said it.


When we get home, he showed me the few pages on reverse psychology. It was quite funny. It has a few scenarios and at the end, it says "Your mom has been using reverse psychology on you all your life and you don't even know it'.


Funny and true indeed!

It's Confirmed

We always joked about Lucas being the second smallest in his class and this has been confirmed by the school. Last week, the whole class was sent to the school nurse. All of them we measured and weighed. Yesterday, Lucas told me:

Lucas: Mom, I'm the second shortest in the class. Do you know who is the shortest?
Me: No, it is a girl or a boy?
Lucas: A girl. Her name starts with S.
Me: Don't know who.
Lucas: Sandya.I am the lightest in the class.
Me: {laughed}
Lucas: The second lightest is 7g more than me.
Me: So now you are confirmed the skinniest and the second shortest in your class.
Lucas: {smiled}

Shortly after, Chloe was taking the opportunity to be sneaky. I told her she can have 3 gummy bears for dessert. After she finished her third, she asked:

Chloe: Mom, can I have some sugar?
Me: You mean gummy bear?
Chloe: {smiled}

How sneaky of her!

You are Perfect!

One day, on the way to school, we had this conversation:
Chloe: Mom, are you fat or thin?
Me: Errr...I am medium.
Lucas: No, Mom. You are perfect!
Me: YES, thank you.

Talk

Lucas can be aggressive if he chooses to, especially when he talks to me. One day, we were in the car. There were ants on his seat. He was making a fuss. This was because during car pool, the kids eat in the car.
Lucas: Mom, there are ants everywhere.
Me: That's because you and J eat in the car. The biscuit crumbs are everywhere. You and J should stopped eating in the car.
Lucas: J started it and you can asked him to stop.
Me: I was driving. You should ask him to stop eating since you can see him and you sit besides him.
Lucas: You drive with your hands. Your bare mouth are not driving. You can asked him to stop eating!

I stopped talking because I sometimes talk in this manner. :(

Chatterboxes and Smart Alecks

They have grown to speak so well...a bit way too well.
At four, she says I am an old lady.
At six, he says I am fat.
I am guessing, at ten, they will say I am senile. At twenty, I should go to nursing home.

Chloe was being naughty.
Me: Who is the naughty girl?
Chloe: m-u-m (she spells it out )
Lucas: Mom is not a girl?
Dom: Then, what is Mom?
Lucas: Mom is an adult.
Chloe: Mom is an old lady!

Lucas was practicing his Bahasa.
Lucas: Emak, awak sihat? (Mom, are you well?)
Me: Ya.
Lucas: Then, why are you so fat?
Me: There are a lot of mummies who are fatter than me.
Lucas: But J's mom is skinner than you.
Me: There are also a lot of mothers who are skinner than me.

Some of the conversations we have:
Lucas: I have not been star of the week for Year 1?
Me: Did you tell Ms E (teacher)?
Lucas:Yes.
Me: What did Ms E say?
Lucas: Ms E said I have to work harder.
Chloe: You just have to try harder.

Lucas: Chloe, let's have a race. See who can change faster (change clothes after shower)
Chloe: Ok.
If Lucas wins,
Chloe: Loser wins.
If Lucas loose.
Chloe: Winner wins.

Lucas got very frustrated and complained to me.
Lucas: Mom! Each time I win, Chloe will say loser wins. When I loose, she will say winner wins.
Me: You don't have to race with her.
Lucas: Chloe, you are Little Miss Fickle.

One day, I was in a car with a friend. Chloe was sitting at the backseat. Once my friend left, Chloe said to me, 'Mom, you talk so much'.!

These days. I have been walking around with Tabasco sauce. It seems to be the best threat. When they are not behaving, I will flash the Tabasco sauce and threatened to put a few drops on their finger. I did not just threatened, I practiced it too. And it works, for the time being.

Made in China, Part 2

On the way back from Hard Rock Hotel, Lucas said, ''I only have 2 things that are not made in China. My badminton racquet is made in England and my drum sticks are made in USA'.

He is still obssessed with the made in China thingy.

Made in China

Since Lucas can read, he has been reading labels on the items, especially his toys. When he see items that did not say 'Made in China', he gets excited.

A few days ago, early in the morning, he was looking for something in the playroom. Then he sounded annoyed (most likely from not finding what he was looking for) and said 'Why is everything made in China?'.

I was tempted to tell him that 80% (or more) of the consumer goods (especially toys) are made in china. But I ended up telling him, 'Because it is cheap to have things made in China'.

I Know, It's Only An Accident

Lucas's favourite phrases now are 'You know what?' or 'I know' or 'It's only an accident?'. When he wants to tell us something, he will begin his sentence with 'You know what? ..... '. If he is doing something he is not supposed to do and being reprimand, he will answer 'I know'. If he did something wrong and he fully aware of it, he will say 'It is only an accident.' Chloe has been picking up those sentences and use all of them today. She has been protecting her brother most time today too.

When I asked the kids to eat their dinner,
Lucas: Mom, it's rice again!
Chloe, Mom, ko-ko wants sandwich. (she knows her brother has been asking for sandwich last few days).
Me: No, ko-ko had sandwich for lunch.
A few minutes later,
Chloe: Mom, ko-ko wants sandwich for dinner.
How sweet of her to ask on behalf of his brother.

During dinner time, Lucas suddenly shaked Chloe's chair so hard while she was eating. I gave Lucas a nice lecture for doing that - telling him he can choke Chloe. Chloe sweetly defended her brother, saying, 'Mom, it is only an accident.'

When both kids are being tucked,
Chloe: Ko-ko, what's with the 'I know, I know?'
A few minutes later,
Chloe: Why are you always saying I know, I know.
Haha...asking her brother!

Oh...they are surely getting along well, teasing each other and partnering well to bully the parents!

My Snobbish Son

How do you tell kids that they are very lucky to have parents and have more things than they need??

Last December, we were at a bookshop. At the cashier, they were some postcards with names and the age of the underprivileged kids. Anyone can buy them book as a gift. So, we asked Lucas to pick a postcard. He chose a boy who was the same age as him and he chose one of the book from Mr Men collection as a gift. He was then given a card to write a message to the kid. And guess what my smart aleck son wrote - poo and pee !!! When we found out, it was too late. Asked him why he wrote such unpleasant message, he said it is funny.

Today, we took him to buy stationery for some underpriviledge kids again. His school is collecting stationery to be donated to underpriviledge kids. I told me beforehand as to why and where we are going. When we get into the shop, he chose his own stationery first. I reminded him we are buying for poor kids and he is not poor. He just ignored me. He did not even bother helping to choose what type of stationery to buy. Fine. When we get home, I was busy taking off the price tag form the items. He saw that there are a few angry bird stationery and he asked, 'Why are you buying these? They don't have iPad and they don't know angry bird.' Dah....what should I say? Snobbish or just plain innocent?

When I told Dominic about this, Dominic told Lucas, 'Maybe we should give your iPad to the poor kids. They will be really happy.' And you know what Lucas answer is.

One day a few weeks ago, we stopped at the traffic light. There was a van full with students beside us. Then I said:
Me: Lucas, look at the van. All the children are from your school.
Lucas: Why are they in the van?
Me: Because their Mommies and Daddies have to work and cannot send them to school. When Mommy and Daddy have to work, you will have to take the van too.
Lucas: Of course NOT.
Me: Then how are you going to school?
Lucas: I will go with Auntie S (my neighbour whom I car pool with)

Is he having it too good? BTW, he weighs 16.5kg and 108cm.

He just discovered he can move faster and easier in the pool if he stays in this pose.

He is more confident when he has cousin swimming with him. Jumping off the ledge ..

Little helper or trouble maker ?

He came back from the neighbour's house with the mask and hand robot saying the neighbour gave them to him.

Common Enemy

My kids have already gang-up to bully me. Their common enemy is me, and it gives them so much joy and laughter to run me down.

Lucas: Chloe, you are a stubborn stubborn girl!
Chloe: NO! You are stubborn!
Lucas: No, you are the stubborn one!
Chloe: Mummy is the stubborn one.
Lucas: (giggling and whispering) Yes, Mummy is the stubborn one.
Chloe: (giggling and satisfied)

Chloe: You are very naughty, ko-ko.
Lucas: NO!
Chloe: YES!
Lucas: Mommy has gone crazy (giggling)
Chloe: (giggling) Mommy has gone crazy.

A Teenager in the House

Lucas had just completed his first week of school holidays and there are 7 weeks to go!! The first week was at times peaceful and at times full of drama. One incident I must note because it is the first....

Me: Lucas, go take your shower.
Lucas: Wait, after this game (he is addicted to these games called Ninja Jump and Run Run Chicken on the iPad).
Me: (after a few minutes) You better go now before I punish you with no iPad for the rest of the day.
Lucas: FINE!! (not pleased at all with the threat).

A few seconds later.....BANGGGG - Lucas slammed the bedroom door to show his displeasure!
Dom : He is not even 5 but he is behaving like a teenager.
Me: What is he going to do when he is a teenager, threaten to commit suicide or run-away?
Dom: No, we will not get that far. He will just out-talk us using logic.
Me: (not so sure and is worried)


The next day, he was playing too much iPad again. I get him to do a few pages of activity book to break his iPad time. When he was done,

Me: Lucas, put the book and the colour pencils back to the playroom.
Lucas: I am not a maid, OK!
Me: (stunned) Daddy, you know what Lucas just said?
Dom: What?
Me: He said he is not cleaning up his pencils and book because he is not a maid!
Dom: Lucas, you cannot be a maid! You don't know how to do anything to be a maid. A maid knows much better than you.
Me: OK, no more iPad for today.

Luckily, no door slamming this time.

Born Bossy or True Boss?

When we were younger, we were afraid of our parents. You tried to answer back your parents and see what happened! Now, kids are a whole new bred. The parents are afraid of their kids.

At 7am this morning, Lucas asked for milk. I said wait until the sun is up and the alarm clock goes off at 7.45am. Guess what was his reply ? He said 'You go and make my milk right now. Or else I will smack you.' Aiyo-yo, should I smack him at 7am?

Then after his milk, he asked for junk food. I said no. He then replied 'You cannot say no. You have to give me the answer I want.' I was shocked of course. Then I asked Dominic if we ever talked like this. Dominic candid answer was 'I think he is born a true boss. He talks like one.'

The way Lucas talks, one of these days, he is going to be beaten up by his friends. Maybe this is more effective than me trying to talk logic into him.

Mature Conversation

My little smart aleck is getting smart again. Today we had this conversation.

I'm tucking him to bed.
Lucas: Mommy, you have to sleep with me.
Me: Why?
Lucas: Be-cause, you are my best friend. Best friend sleep over sometimes.
Me: What is sleep over?
Lucas: Sleep over is when 2 people sleep in the same bed.
He must have learned this from TV.

A few weeks ago, we stayed over at my parents' place for the weekend.
Lucas: Mommy, who is your mommy?
Me: Poh-poh is my mommy.
Lucas: Who is your Daddy?
Me: Kung-kung is my daddy.
Lucas: You must be very happy now be-cause your Daddy and Mommy are here.
Does this statement tell me something?? It definitely does!

Don't You Understand

When Lucas is very persistent such as asking the same question 10 times when I have already answered him, I sometimes get frustrated and tell him something like 'You understood what Mommy just said. Why are you asking again?'

Yesterday, the smart aleck used the 'weapon' on me. He was calling out for his Daddy but Dominic was busy. So, I went to him and said:

Me: Daddy is busy, what do you want?
Lucas: I want Daddy, don't you understand!
Me: OK...